The answer is: not a lot. Unless you have to get your ear flushed out. Then the connection is painful yet clear. Today at the health center I was positively dapper. I made doctors and nurses and even the stuffy ladies who check you in laugh. Not just a chuckle, these were good ol' jolly belly laughs. I was on FIRE. And this was because I definitely did NOT want any one of these fine people to attach a syringe to a tube to a squirt bottle, fill said squirt bottle with luke warm water, and then shove the syringe into my ear, squeezing the squirt bottle with such force that it would feel like Niagra Falls just set up shop in my ear canal. I thought I could charm them out of it. I almost did. But I got suckered in with their promises of US Weekly Magazine and a nice lounge chair covered in wax paper. I will know better next time.
Ear flushing is a terrifying thing. But it is real funny if the nurse starts saying things like, "Honey, I know they don't give out trophies for this sort of thing, but they should. Because you'd get the lot of them." And, "I've never, in all my days, seen something like this." That, my friends, is not something you ever want to hear coming out of a health professional's mouth. But the good thing is that my hearing is now so crisp, I can practically hear an ant tiptoeing three miles away!
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