This morning we had a small moment of silence for David Foster Wallace in class. It was just a bunch of writers heads bowed over the first page of a rather exquisite fiction piece he wrote in which he delivered Marlon Brando from a somewhat brutish interpretation to that of a poignant, multi-dimensional one and it was breathtaking. We sat in silence and read in silence until our professor finally said something: "Perhaps writing is a dangerous thing." And then: "I do not know why I feel this loss of David so much. I miss him." So all day I just wanted to get home so I could reread his commencement speech at Kenyon College because in it he is wise and honest, and it got me thinking how profound and lovely a gesture any speck of honesty is these days. Here is what he says towards the end:
That is real freedom. That is being educated, and understanding how to think. The alternative is unconsciousness, the default setting, the rat race, the constant gnawing sense of having had, and lost, some infinite thing.
I know that this stuff probably doesn't sound fun and breezy or grandly inspirational the way a commencement speech is supposed to sound. What it is, as far as I can see, is the capital-T Truth, with a whole lot of rhetorical niceties stripped away. You are, of course, free to think of it whatever you wish. But please don't just dismiss it as just some finger-wagging Dr. Laura sermon. None of this stuff is really about morality or religion or dogma or big fancy questions of life after death.
The capital-T Truth is about life BEFORE death.
It is about the real value of a real education, which has almost nothing to do with knowledge, and everything to do with simple awareness; awareness of what is so real and essential, so hidden in plain sight all around us, all the time, that we have to keep reminding ourselves over and over:
"This is water."
"This is water."
It is unimaginably hard to do this, to stay conscious and alive in the adult world day in and day out. Which means yet another grand cliché turns out to be true: your education really IS the job of a lifetime. And it commences: now.
I wish you way more than luck."
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