HOW TO MAKE MILLIONS OF DOLLARS WRITING FLUFF

1. Research "The Market"

2. Discover that the New York Times bestsellers list is consistently topped by inspirational animal books like Dewey the Library Cat: The Small-Town Library Cat Who Touched the World AND its hit sequel, Dewey's Nine Lives: The Legacy of a Small-Town Library Cat Who Inspired Millions. 

3. Bemoan the world that allowed these books to make millions of dollars because they had large photos of cuddly animals on their covers.

4. Have an A-Ha! Moment: Must write a nonfiction book that stars a cuddly critter doing inspiring things in the human world, thus bringing Mini Donkeys Take Manhattan to life.

5. Make a fellow MFA alum pretend to write above fake book with you and create an accompanying fake book cover and fake book blurb. It's just so crazy that it might work!

Thus, I present to you what has been at least three years in the making, a sure fire plan that will rake in the moolah in no time flat. I mean, just take a look at the future book cover. It's fail proof!

"Just when everyone, including every MFA graduate in existence, thought that an MFA in nonfiction writing was useless, this sparkling, poignant, debut emerges from the ashes to change your attitude, your life, and--yes-- even the world: MINI DONKEYS TAKE MANHATTAN.

Written by two gifted alumni of the University of Iowa's Nonfiction Writing Program, Lina F. (originally from Argentina) and Amy S., this moving collection of photo essays documents a herd of mini donkeys as they navigate the cruel, cold streets of Manhattan. 

Follow young Cupcake, Sprinkles, and Fred, as they lead their innocent herd to famed sights, such as the Empire State Building, Chinatown, and Central Park. As you watch them nibble on treats from Magnolia Bakery and scamper in the autumnal landscape of the city's parks, your heart will melt and you will understand the precious, fragile, vulnerable, essential beauty of the human--and animal--condition: a beating heart."

You're so in, am I right? So, if you could make your millions by writing an inspirational animal book such as Dewey the Library Cat or Mini Donkeys Take Manhattan, what would be your animal and how would it inspire the world?

*Fake book inspired by and dedicated to Sunbun, the cutest mini donkey I know.

**THIS JUST IN: MERYL STREEP IS GOING TO STAR IN THE DEWEY MOVIE!!!!! Best tip ever from Kendra. Meryl Streep, people! Seriously.